Cult of Dan Brown: The Da Vinci Code's grail story in modern music

The chapter I have quoted from discusses the bloodline of Jesus and Mary Magdalene, not their marriage, and asks us to take on faith, until later chapters, that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married to each other. I quoted the book to back up my theory about a rock song.

While I don't feel like quoting word for word huge sections of the book, I will type up this little bit regarding Jesus' marriage to Mary Magdalene.

Cana was a small ancient town in Galilee where Christ attended a marriage feast during which he is said to have performed his first miracle of changing water into wine. Mary also attended the wedding feast, and asked Jesus to replenish the supply of wine. Mary told the servants to do whatever Jesus wanted them to do. The servants responded as if they felt it natural for Jesus and Mary to give them orders. However, it seems improbable that two guests at a wedding feast would take upon themselves the responsibility of ensuring that there was sufficient wine. It also seems unlikely that Jesus would use this opportunity to perform his first miracle as some kind of "party trick." It is far more likely that this was the marriage of Jesus, and he was responsible for providing more wine. Also, the Gospel of St. John 2:9-10 reports that the "Governor of the Feast," whose role was perhaps similar to that of the present-day Best Man, tastes the wine: "the governor of the feast called the bridegroom. And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when the men have well drunk, then that which is worst; but thou has kept the good wine till now." He must have been addressing Jesus as the provider of the wine, and therefore the bridegroom.

The book I quote from, in my opinion, now that I have nearly finished it, does not disect The Da Vinci Code as thoroughly as I would have hoped. The theories that Dan Brown puts forward are supported rather than dismantled and I was left thinking, "but I thought that bit was blatantly wrong". Admittedly, the things that I believe to be wrong about The Da Vinci Code are trivial, such as the geography of Paris, and the presence of "containment security" in The Louvre. It also threw in some other theories that seemed to good for Dan Brown to have left out. Maybe Dan Brown hadn't heard about them or had edited them out (being as guilty as Constantine then of not giving us the full truth, but there again, Dan Brown wasn't writing a history text book, he was writing fiction). Anyway, this'll have all you conspiracy buffs in a frenzy - Jesus had a twin called Thomas. If this fact could ever be proven, bang goes the entire Christian faith. How could Jesus be the son of God if he had a mortal twin brother. Take a look at The Last Supper again and look how similar Jesus looks to the guy sat next to the end. The Da Vinci Code Decoded also posits that Jesus was a freedom fighter (Messiah meaning saviour in an entirely different context) and his entrance into Jerusalem on a donkey during passover was a clear sign to the Romans, who had abolished the Jewish monarchy, that he was out to cause a stir. You see, according to The Da Vinci Code Decoded, the custom was that every king from the Davidic line entered Jerusalem on a donkey, during passover, shortly before his coronation. He was basically giving a big middle finger to Pontious Pilate. Jesus' crime was "King of The Jews" and it really was that crime that got him killed. No Jew was responsible for that, it was all the Romans' fault. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mel Gibson!!

Please bear in mind that these are theories, and should be treated as such. If you look at them as truth, then you might as well just set up a religion based on it. Question everything. Trust nothing, but accept that they may be the truth, or at least more truthful than the watered down Christainity perpetrated by thousands of people since, for their own personal/political reasons. Example, I was once told by a Mormon that Jesus turned water into grapejuice. Grapejuice?!?? F***ing GRAPEJUICE!?!?? Do me a favour, go home tonight, re-read the bible, and then tell me that 2000 years ago, the people of Galilee knew the difference between grapejuice and wine!

I'm interested in this sort of thing because I was Christian, a member of the Church of the New Jerusalem, a.k.a. Swedenborgian Church. As an armchair searcher of truth, I know that the search will never end, but I'm enjoying every single theory I come across. Something not mentioned in either book is the possibility that Jesus survived the crucifixion (others have), and went on to preach in India!

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